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Eyes like saucers, mouth an eternal o! - The Annals of Young Geoffrey: Hope brings a turtle [entries|archive|friends|userinfo]
Young Geoffrey

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Eyes like saucers, mouth an eternal o! [Sep. 27th, 2012|11:59 pm]
Young Geoffrey
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"Shoot them," I said. "Just shoot them. Problem solved."

"What do you mean," the President asked.

"Just shoot the clients," I said. "Shoot johns. Denmark or Sweden — one of those Scandinavian countries anyway, I forget which one — has already taken the first step. They've criminalized buying sex, rather than selling it.

"But if you really want to solve the problem, capital punishment is the only way to go. Lesser punishment's just won't do the trick."

My pun elicited no response. The President just looked at her plate, then glanced back at me, eyes wide, eyes fucking turning themselves inside out.

So much so that it took me a while to realize what I had done, and so I started talking across the table, rejoining a second conversation for a while, before I realized the President of my writer's organization was still staring at me.

The proverbial cartoon light-bulb finally switched on above my balding pate. "Hey," I said, and I reached out to touch her shoulder, "I didn't mean it. I was kidding. I'm actually opposed to capital punishment."

The relief face expressed, the relief from the face of a woman I barely know, must have been palpable three tables away. But still, I thought I should make my position absolutely clear; I joined the group to network, after all! "Really, I was joking. I don't believe the solution to the problems associated with prostitution is to shoot all the johns."

"I'm very glad to hear it," she said. "You really shocked me." And we went on to talk of other things.

And I went on to contemplate the importance of context in any kind of colloquial communication, but especially when it comes to humour.

We all know how easy it is to miss irony and sarcasm online, but it can be almost as easy to miss it face-to-face.

And apropos of nothing in particular except as a reward for your patience with my self-indulgence, when you're safely away from the prying eyes of colleagues at work, you owe it to yourselves to have a look that the ladytits .

Click the cartoon to see the full-size original.
We can't guarantee this really happened but it definitely happened allegorically. And I hope you'll visit www.oglaf.com for more.

This entry was originally posted at http://ed-rex.dreamwidth.org/243395.html. Comment there using OpenID, or here as per normal.

[User Picture]From: silverflight8
2012-09-28 03:30 pm (UTC)
You know I'm not sure I mentioned it before, but I love that you have a tag labelled "random gloats". Makes me laugh every time.
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[User Picture]From: ed_rex
2012-10-02 05:08 am (UTC)

*No one* has mentioned it before

And now that you have, I feel compelled to explain its provenance, which dates back to a magazine (of sorts) that I put together in high school, called The House of the Dying Tree. If memory serves, one of my friends at the time (the inimitable and now semi-famous Toronto musician and producer Ian Blurton (if this blatant name-dropping ripples through the aether, hi Ian!) wanted to include a gossip column, which he called (you guessed it) "Random Gloats".

Since I was a bookish, not to say nerdy, boy more attuned to Harper's than to Rolling Stone I was not then aware that Ian's title was a play on the latter journal's "Random Notes" section. To me, it was just a kind of funny but euphonious sound that appealed.

Which means that, until you pointed it out, I'm not sure I even realized the second word implies braggadicio.

Ah well ...
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[User Picture]From: talktooloose
2012-09-28 03:56 pm (UTC)
"Random goats?"

I like your story and I love OGLAF. Have you read Chester Brown's "Paying for it"?
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[User Picture]From: ed_rex
2012-10-02 05:11 am (UTC)

As a matter of fact, I have

Se my reply to silverflight8 above for the dirt on "Random GLoats".

As for Chester Brown's latest, I have read it. And reviewed it. See You're a dirty whore-monger, Chester Brown, if you're interested in it.

What did you think of the book?
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